If you’ve ever wanted to learn exactly how to stand in your power, this interview with Kasia Urbaniak, a former dominatrix, is for you.
As women, we’ve been told that we need to be powerful. In the workplace, we must speak up and hold our own. There have been so many times in my life, where I’ve felt shy, insecure and afraid in conversations. I’ve frozen, said nothing, then walked away feeling weak and ashamed. Accordingly to Kasia, this is an extremely common occurrence and she explains why.
“When someone puts attention on a woman that is uncomfortable, inappropriate, or possibly illegal like in the example of sexual harassment, what happens is, the attention goes on the woman, the woman moves her attention even further inward. It’s our default. It’s what we’re trained to do to be good. And then we freeze. In this state, the amygdala in the brain gets hijacked, and we lose access to speech. It’s not that we are choosing silence, but we literally cannot speak.” In the interview, Kasia gives a few examples of verbal self defense that we can use in these moments to regain access to speech and shift the power dynamic.
Kasia is now CEO of The Academy, a school that teaches women the foundations of power and influence.
To learn more about her, go to her website.
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